art in the great unknown...

Why do we believe the lies the world tells us about ourselves? Most of these lies come from people we have never met, people we never will meet, people who we are desperately seeking approval from, and from people who have much too a big opinion about themselves. Why do we care so much?

I have noticed something in myself, since living here now for over 6 months. Anniversary day today, actually. I think I have a heathier opinion of myself. I can't believe I actually wrote this. Outloud. Considering, I came to this unknown country, by myself, into a great great unknown, releasing control on all that was familiar. Its amazing to me, how any experience of the unfamiliar can really bring us onto new ground with ourselves. You know what I mean? We confront things we don't want to confront, we see things we don't want to see...and yet...we see things that we never even dreamed we would see. The good things. The things we never knew existed. Or never even thought of embracing.

Its like looking at a painting up close. You knew it was beautiful, because you have had it on your wall your whole life. Until one day, you take time to look at the strokes, the texture, the colours. You press your nose to the painting...slowly backing away, and you realize all the work the artist went to, to create the piece. Maybe, for you, its not even a painting, but a photograph or a piece of music, that somehow speaks to you.

In a couple days, Japan celebrates what they call "Girls Day." (Momo no Sekku, Hina no Sekku, or Hina Matsuri). Families with young daughters celebrate to ensure their daughters' happiness in later life (and sometimes simply to express a general "yay, we have a daughter and are proud of her" sentiment); part of the festival involves a set of ceremonial dolls which the family will display in the best room in the house for a few days . The festival also used to mark the "official" start of spring.

Do any of us know how truely beautiful we are? Will we ever know how truely beautiful we are? We are works of art. The other day, I was walking down a very popular street in Kyoto, Gion Street, known for Geisha sitings. The streets are lined with traditional tea houses, sushi stores, and romantically lit restraunts. Sure enough, later in the evening, while walking in the rain, I saw a Geisha - a women wearing the white makeup, red lips, hair tightly wrapped with flowers, and the most beautiful kimono. Dispite the rain, she elegantly walked, grasping the end of her kimono and holding her red parisal. I had goosebumps. This is the very first time I had seen this in Japan. In real life. She was literally breathtaking. I did a double take. I could believe that I was actually seeing what all the travel and history books speak about. a geisha. Sigh...

Perhaps this is the kind of beauty that God created each of us with. The double take, goosebump, breathtaking kind. I see this in so many of you. As I sit here with tears in my eyes, I am reminded how each of you are of such a gift to me. You are a painting. Today, I will paint you all in my mind.

you are art, to me.

dedicated to: you know who you are.