soak in a moment.

I have come to the conclusion that I love change. I love being in flux. Change is the life inside me. When I get in a rut, I will rearrange furniture, change my hair colour (or even cut my own hair, like a did a while back), renovate the blog, take the long way home from work on day, or attempt to sit at the piano and work on writing.

While being here has made me realize that change is a craving of mine, attempting to live in the very present of every moment is a more difficult task. I think this is actually quite a profound thing. Maybe its not even a task at all, but an act of letting go to the quest for change. Simply being. Simply dwelling in the moment.

So often, when I have my days off here, and I find myself on the footsteps of a temple or shrine, my first thought is often, "I must take a picture. " I don't stop to soak it in, to breathe it in. Aftwards, I think, why didn't I just take a moment...for the moment. Do you know what I mean? Simply soak in the present. Did you ever stop to think that the word "present" is not just in the moment, but it is also a gift as well. You recieve it. Sometimes we often don't realize the very nature of it until its gone or the moment has passed.

I often get so ahead of myself here. Thinking about my future, about relationships, about things I want to do or avoid, experiences I want to have or goals I want to accomplish.

Before I left for Japan, I was speaking in the "I hope...I want..." type of language, and when I arrrived I thought this would cease, and I would be able to live in every moment. While there have been many moments of suspended time here for me, I still try to look too far ahead. So far ahead, that it gets foggy and I can't see. I try to answer the questions that I don't have the power or wisdom to answer. I think God gives us time for a reason. To recieve each moment as a gift. A present, if you will.

Take a moment today, whatever your doing. Recieve it. Draw near to it. Listen to it. Taste it. Hey, smell it if you want.